I never really understood the concept of those porcelain dolls. Sure they were pretty and nice to look at, but they never went anywhere with you. They always sat on a shelf and collected dust until YOU decided that you wanted to play with them... or that they were worthy of your attention (I say this for metaphorical purposes). If the doll had feelings, she probably felt used and second rate, a substitute for some other toy... any other toy, a last resort conveniently located in the house, on the shelf, on a rainy day. She was reliable, because you could count on her to be there when you had nothing else to do and needed company... or just happened to be in the area... because she had no life of her own...
This may sound pathetic, but I realized earlier in the shower that I had allowed myself to be treated like a porcelain doll. My plans shouldn't be contingent on when whoever is going to call or thinks they might stop by. The fact that you decided you were in town this weekend does not obligate me to sit in my room on my shelf-like bed and wait for you to call me so that I can ensure my availability for you. I know I was doing this because of my being interested, but looking on the situation now... um, I'm worth so much more than a poorly thought out attempt to hang out with me. So, don't try to pencil me in according to who's available to you because I won't be around. I'm not obligated to be. To think I'd consider anticipating a phone call or text message, not enjoying my time out with my girls on account of you is absolutely pathetic. I hate my tendency to be so accomodating but it stops right here.
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