missing

I've been thinking a lot about things since I've been home, and I realize part of why my life is so weird now. I'm at a serious loss for intimacy. You may have picked up on it in my previous journals, but I'm just now able to pinpoint it. When I say intimacy, I don't necessarily mean physical intimacy. I mean emotional intimacy. I don't no how I survive really, well I do but it seems like I should be outta my mind. I have learned to survive on less than 3 hugs a week. That's extremely sad, pathetic almost. I'm left without someone tangible to whom I can tell what's going on in my head and in my heart and listen to the same for them... someone who looks at me and really sees me and can tell me about myself because they (unlike most people) know who I am and how I think and what I really go through (not just the easyjournal version or the brief passing on Skiles Walkway version). I don't know how much longer I can survive like this... with that large piece of my life missing...
Posted on 10.20.2005 at 1:31 AM